My three crabs.....

ok, maybe not the most appropriate title for this blog, but at least i'm making an attempt at humor now.....

We saw the RE for the last time today. It's kind of bittersweet. I love all the amazing ladies at Midwest Fertility and I will miss the security that I have with them. But now it's onto the high risk ob/gyn.

I had another ultrasound today to see my little three. And yes, at this point they look like crabs. Dr. Reuter said that everything looks great. All babies (aka babies A, B & C) have strong heart beats and measure approx. 1/2 inch each. She said everything looks normal and at this point everyone appears to be right on schedule.

So, my next step is seeing a maternal fetal medicine and genetics specialist for another ultrasound on the 12th and then I meet with the high risk ob and his team on the 15th.

I hope that each and everyone of you have a great Thanksgiving!! We have a ton to be thankful for this year!!!

My new words to live by...

JEREMIAH 29:11

New Living Translation (NLT)
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.

The Message (MSG)
10-11This is God's Word on the subject: "As soon as Babylon's seventy years are up and not a day before, I'll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.

HOLY CRAP!!! (it's the only appropriate title for this blog!!!)

OK, so today was/is the big day!!! We went this morning at 11:15 for our first ultrasound. I immediately saw two sacs on the screen and what kind of looked like a third.

The doctor checked the first one(aka baby A).....good strong heart beat.

She moved onto the second(aka baby B).....another good strong heart beat.

Then she looked at the little small sac that she originally thought was nothing....and yep, another good strong heart beat(aka baby C). The third one is smaller than the other two, but has the strongest and highest heart rate.

I'm not sure what else to say at this point. I'm having trouble formulating complete sentences let alone composing a blog. Terry and I are both still in shock. Give me a couple of days to let it sink in and I will post more.

T-minus two hours and Counting.....

Ok, so I just wanted to do a small "pre-post" this morning. I have to give my boss, Andy, major kudos for being super cool.

I've left out a lot of the small details in my postings. During the whole IUI process, I went to the doctor almost everyday. I either had blood work, and ultrasound or both everyday or every other day. Most of the time I was able to schedule my appointments early enough to make it to work on time. But there were several times that I was 15-30 minutes late because the office was running behind.

So, I'm sure that everyone knows that my ultrasound is at 11:15 EST today. I'm basically just taking a long lunch and Terry is meeting me at the office. Andy told me to take my time and go out and have lunch with Terry afterwards. I'm so lucky to have a boss who is so flexible. Making the switch between agents almost 4 years ago was very difficult for me, but I've never regretted it for one moment!!!

Just a thought....

Revelations 3:8

When God leads you to the edge of the cliff, trust Him fully and let go, only 1 of 2 things will happen, either He'll catch you when you fall, or He'll teach you how to fly! 'The power of one sentence! God is going to shift things around for you today and let things work in your favor. God closes doors no man can open & God opens doors no man can close. If you need God to open, some doors for you...remember what your knees are for. Have a blessed day and remember to be a blessing...

I think it's gonna stick!!!

Ok, so I had my second BETA test yesterday. Yes, my RE's office is open on Sundays. Blood work came back at 711!!! The nurse said that is a fabulous number.

My first ultrasound is schedule for 11-19. So, hopefully then I will be able to finally believe it. I'm still a little freaked out about the fact that we have the potential for multiples, but God won't dump more on me than I can handle, right??

OMG!!!!

Ok, so after taking 6 HPT's (all postitive), I had my BETA this morning. I'm 307!!

I don't think that I really believe it yet! I go back on Sunday for another round of bloodwork. Maybe then I will believe it.

Thank you so much to all the ladies who have walked me thru this and for each and every one of your prayers!!!

The most amazing feeling was hearing the sound of my husbands voice when I told him. His response..."wow, I'm gonna be a Dad".

Praise God!!! My only path to peace on this journey with infertility has been my relationship with God. He showed me things i never would have seen without Him, and taught me lessons I never could have learned!

More waiting.... GRRRRR!!!

Ok, so... yes you guessed it.... I took another HPT this morning when I got up. POSITIVE!!!
So, I just got the official blood work done at the doctors office. And now we wait. This process has been extremely stressful, but in the end, if it works... all the waiting will be totally worth it. I know that they close at noon today so I will have some idea of what's going on before then.

I have a death grip on my cell phone and I'm praying harder than I ever have before!!!!

Reminder & note to self: GOD IS IN CONTROL!!! ULTIMATELY, HE KNOWS WHAT YOUR JOURNEY ENTAILS.

I keep reminding myself the words of my beautiful friend Robin.....Put your faith in the Lord...lean not on your own understanding! It is all going to work out!

I'm starting to get excited...

ok, so I had sales meetings all afternoon yesterday. I got home early (like 4:30), I pee'd on a stick again. POSITIVE!!!

I talked to my sister last night. Being a nurse, she said that she won't believe it until I use my first pee of the morning. (sorry too much info, I know) So, I did it again this morning POSITIVE AGAIN!!!

So, I think that it worked!!! I'm still trying not to get too excited because I've been in this position before and then It went away. So, I'm anxiously counting the hours until my appointment tomorrow!!!

Terry's starting to get excited too. This morning when he kissed me good bye, he rubbed my belly and said I love you. I almost wanted to cry. We both want this so much!!

Maybe???

ok, so I caved. I had to run to CVS to pick up my prenatal vitamin rx. I had to walk right by the prego tests to get to the pharmacy in the back of the store. Yes, I know what you are thinking! I said I wasn't going to do it. But big shocker... I bought one. I went directly back to the office and pee'd on the stick. It was positive. My iui was on 10-17 & 10-18 and my BETA is on Friday 10-31. Is it too soon for me to actually be getting a positive reading? My RE warned me about false positives.... but I think that I just wanted to see what a positive actually looked like. I'm trying not to get my hopes up just in case, but It would be really great if God has decided to bless me with this miracle.

I did a first response digital hpt. The little tiny hourglass flashes for what feels like days and then it says pregnant or not pregnant. This one was flashing and while I was washing my hands and refreshing my lipstick I looked over and it said "pregnant". So, It didn't even take the full 3 minutes. I'm kinda kicking myself for not waiting, because I really want to be super excited, but I don't want to celebrate too soon!!

More waiting.....

OK, so we had a great weekend...

I took Terry to a local pumpkin patch & corn maze. Can you believe that a 42 year old man has never been to a pumpkin patch? He blames it on growing up in Chicago. Even though we had a great time together, it was still kinda sad. Everyone on the hayride to the pumpkin patch was with their children...and here sat alone, my husband and I, childless.

But I digress, We can only hope that this time next year we have a little one to take with us. But I am constantly trying to remind myself that GOD IS IN CONTROL!!! NOT ME, BUT GOD!!!

But I do have to share a story, If this offends anyone I apologize in advance.

Terry shared with me his story of "depositing his specimen" as he calls it...
The doctors office apparently has a "video of the day". I guess that makes sense. If you have to "deposit" two days in a row, this way you don't get bored right? Well, apparently my husband is rather picky with his porn. I won't tell you what he said about Friday's video. But Saturday, I guess the video obviously had two people engaging in the physical act of love. But here's the kicker.... it was thru a fence. The guy on one side and the woman on the other. Apparantly, Terry was not at all impressed with what we now refer to as "fence porn". He commented on how the woman looked like a devil.

I'm not sure why this is so funny to me. But I guess if you can't find something little to laugh about during this process you are going to drive yourself nuts.

We are hoping that the crazy "devil fence porn" story is some kind of crazy sign. We do our test on Friday, October 31st. HALLOWEEN!! My older sister found out on Halloween 5 years ago that she was prego. Sounds like a sign to me???

I'm trying soooo hard to be optimistic!! But the 2ww is KILLING ME!!!!

The waiting is killing me!!!

Ok, so I'm one week post iui.

I went to my RE's office this morning for bloodwork. Basically from what I understand they are checking my progesterone levels. The doc wants to make sure that it greater than 20 so that my body can substain a pregnancy if God grants us the opportunity!

I got the call from the office that everything looks good. I ovulated and my progesterone is greater than 20.

So on with more waiting!!!

Now we wait.....

ok, so we had the actual IUI (Intrauterine insemination) procedure done yesterday and today....

Hopefully we aren't starting any traditions, but Terry went to the doc early to "watch his porn" as he so politely puts it. We met for breakfast and then both went back together. We did this both days. It was nice to enjoy a bite to eat together, even though I was so nervous on Friday that I just nibbled on my pancakes.

Friday, Shelly did the procedure. I barely felt anything. I asked her if she was doing it because I didn't feel it. Saturday was a different story. Another nurse practitioner in the office, that I was not familiar with, did the procedure. I've been told that your uterus moves so that may have been the cause of my pain, but WOW what a difference a day makes. I didn't really care for her bedside manner but Terry thinks it may just be due to the fact that it wasn't Shelly. I've grown really comfortable with Shelly and I kinda freek out a little when I have to deal with some one new.

So now we begin the 2 week wait!! Let the prayers begin!!!

Two posts in One...

I'm a little behind in posting...

Had an appointment on 10-14 & on 10-16 both for ultrasounds. Looks like my follicles are growing!!! Grow baby Grow!! On Tuesday, Shelly the nurse said there were six each between 14-11. On Thursday she said there were 3. I'm not sure where the other 3 went but I'm keeping my fingers crossed that the 3 that I have keep growing strong!!!

Tomorrow is the big day!!

Terry goes tomorrow at 8:30 to "deposit his specimen" and I go at 9:45 for implantation!!

I'm freeking out a little!!!

OUCH!!

ok, so my meds arrived today. I was totally freaked out about having to give myself a shot, seeing as how I HATE needles.

We have some friends in town, one of which is a nurse. I figured that If I couldn't do it, at least she would be around. I tried to pump myself up to do it myself because I know that Nicole won't be around everyday that I need meds.

Finally after a small panic attack, I DID IT!!! Terry was right next to me supporting me, but he couldn't look at the needle.... Hence the reason why I'm giving the shots to myself!

It's really not that bad. I think it's more in my head than anything!!!

In the beginning....

Ok, so today is the beginning. I decided that I would begin to blog this process as not to forget the good, the bad and the exciting times to come. Terry & I have decided that we are not going to share this process with many. It's a very personal situation and it is very stressful. Not many understand the journey of infertility......being constantly poked, proded, monitored etc. It becomes a lot to handle. We just decided that we didn't want to add the questions of friends and family on top of the existing stress.

Today, we meet with the fertility doctor (also known as a reproductive endocrinologist) at 11:30. From my initial understanding, we will have an ultrasound and I will be trained on how to administer the medication to myself. This process scares me completely!! I’m a little freaked out by needles and having to give myself a shot is something that I’m not sure that I can do. But in the end if it works it will be totally worth it

I’m feeling a little light headed and strangely dizzy this morning but I think that it’s just nerves. We shall see how things go.