Tuesday, January 18, 2011

The Future???

I was listening to some random talk radio show on my way home from work the other night.  The dj was discussing how so many people live in the past and don't focus on the future.  It got me thinking.  I do this almost everyday.  I think about how my girls entered this world early and I focus on the past so much that sometimes it becomes an obsession.  One of my biggest goals in 2011 is to become more relaxed and live in the moment.  I'm really working on this, I really am!!  The dj goes on to discuss the future and what things will become obsolete in the future.  He talks about how children today will never know the following things:

Phonebooks, encyclopedias, paper checks, dial-up Internet, pay phones, disposable or 35mm cameras, floppy disks, land line telephones, vcr's, newspapers/print media, cd/cassette players, movie rental stores, answering machines, handwritten letters, drive-in movie theatres, maps.

This was a small portion of the lists that they were discussing.  One of the things that kind of surprised me was that he said Facebook would be out of commission within five years.  I'm not sure why this shocked me but it did.  So a few nights ago, during one of my insomnia moments, I started looking back at all my old Facebook postings.  Yes, I know that this doesn't really go along with my goal of moving out of the past but sometimes in order to live in the future, you must relive the past to move on.  I went back almost two years and read my updates back to the day Addison and Alexis were born.  Man, talk about a good cry!!

Seeing as how they say that Facebook is going to be obsolete, I want to document these moments for future reference.  Notice I said "future"?  I want my girls to know how much they were/are loved and cared for and how people around the world were praying and supporting them.  I won't share every comment from every person, because this blog post would be a million pages long, but I do want to document my updates.  So here we go!!  We shall begin on Easter Day 2009.....

***is spending Easter in the hospital with her hubby.  My water broke this morning and we are trying to keep these girls inside for as long as possible.  I'm not due for another three months.  PRAYERS APPRECIATED!!! --April 12, 2009 @ 4:22pm

***is still in the hospital.  Trying to get two rounds of steroids in before we decide what our next step is.  I'm hanging in and appreciate every one's kind words and prayers.  The babies aren't supposed to be here for a few more months.  --April 12, 2009 @ 8:33pm

***had two baby girls around 3:30a..m. this Monday Morning!!  --April 13, 2009 @ 6:48am

***has two new baby girls that are feisty and holding strong.  No news is good news right?  We will know a lot more in 48 hours.  Thanks for every one's prayers.  Keep 'em coming!!! --April 13, 2009 @ 6:34pm

***the girls are holding their own.  Brain scans tomorrow a.m. & if all goes well Addison may have her breathing tube removed.  Keep up the prayers, they are working!!  God is Great! --April 14, 2009 @ 8:04pm

***is numb.  Trying to stay positive but it's SO hard.  All I can do is pray.  I feel so helpless!!  --April 15, 2009 @ 11:46am

***was just pee'd on by her daughter Alexis.  How can something so normal mean so much?  Both girls are still in critical condition in the NICU and need your prayers.  Miracles happen right?  --April 15, 2009 @ 8:06pm

***Faith makes things possible, Not Easy!!  Thank you all for all your prayers and support.  Please keep them coming!  Everyday is a blessing from God!!  -- April 16, 2009 @ 2:55pm

***leaving the hospital without my two miracles.  It feels like someone is stabbing me in the heart with a knife over and over again.  Trying to be strong.....  --April 16, 2009 @ 6:21pm

***is asking for extra prayers today!  They are going to try and take my baby girl Addison off her breathing tube today and put her on c-pap.  Keep your fingers crossed!  --April 19, 2009 @ 12:38pm

***has two feisty little girls who are both breathing without the help of respirators!!!  Both babes now on c-pap!!!  Prayers are slowly being answered one by one!!!  --April 19, 2009 @ 5:23pm

***is hoping and praying that the weather is the only yucky thing I have to deal with today!  Praying for some good news!  --April 20, 2009 @ 8:13am

***is wishing my baby girls, Addison and Alexis, a happy "one week" birthday!!!  Too bad they aren't home to celebrate.  --April 20, 2009 @ 9:18pm

***has officially removed the word "why" from her vocabulary.  --April 21, 2009 @ 9:25am

***is the happiest I have EVER been!!!  I just got to hold both my girls for the first time!!!  --April 23, 2009 @ 6:38pm

***is driving to the hospital to see her girls with the sunroof open.  What a beautiful day!  Praying for more good news.  Trying to stay positive!  --April 24, 2009 @ 1:42pm

***is struggling!!!  --April 25, 2009 @ 10:59am

***is once again irritated by people who complain about trivial things.  When you think your life is bad, look around, count your blessings and be grateful for all God has given you!!!  There is always someone worse off than you!  --April 26, 2009 @ 9:53am

***just to clarify, before you decided to have a pity party for yourself, take a look around and count your blessings!  It's the only way I make it through the day lately.  A positive attitude is a lot easier said that done, but it sure helps alot!!  --April 26, 2009 @ 4:53pm

***I'm usually up and at the hospital by 10.  It's almost noon and I just got out of the shower.  I'm pretty sure I'd lose my head right now if it wasn't attached!  --April 27, 2009 @ 11:49am

***Please check the blog for updates on the babies.  Please don't be angry if we don't return your call, text or emails.  We spend 85% of the day in the hospital where phones are not allowed.  The other 15% of the time we are trying to figure out how to function.  Don't judge, be supportive please!!  --April 27, 2009 @ 7:02 pm

***is trying to relax.  That's what everyone keeps telling me I "need" to do.  It's not really working.  --April 27th, @ 11:59pm

***is thinking....current life situation + allergies = I should buy stock in Kleenex.  --April 28, 2009 @ 10:13an

***has not been very fond of Mondays lately, but I'm hoping and praying we get some good news from the doctors today!!  Fingers crossed and praying!!!  --May 4, 2009 @ 9:07am

***is hoping today goes as planned.  Today could be another major milestone in my little girls lives.  --May 6, 2009 @ 10:00am

***loves listening to her hubby talk to our girls.  It's so sweet and their reactions are priceless.  I thank God everyday for our two little miracles.  --May 6, 2009 @ 4:12pm

***is on a mission to find clothes (not onesies) for her daughter's one month pictures and the first time they will actually be allowed to wear clothes! GRRR!!!  You would think a store designed specifically for babies (babies 'r us) would sell preemie clothes???  --May 8, 2009 @ 6:28pm

***can't believe everything that all the doctors and nurses in the n.i.c.u. are doing to try and make my first mother's day so special.  Everyone has been so great to us!  --May 9, 2009 @9:33am

***has used about a half a box of kleenex already today and it's only 1:00.  --May 10, 2009 @ 12:54pm

***is not fond of the metric system or military time.  I'm sure there is a good reason why hospitals have to make things more difficult than they really are?  --May 11, 2009 @ 6:39pm

***is looking forward to getting out of the hospital and going to bible study group for the first time in months.  --May 12, 2009 @ 4:34pm

***wishes she had a magic wand.  --May 13, 2009 @ 8:21am

***is having a good week and hopes it continues.  --May 13, 2009 @ 9:44pm

***is off to the hospital to give the girls their first bath and put them in real clothes.  They are officially off their warmers and can wear real clothes now.  YEAH!!!  --May 14, 2009 @ 11:52am

***is playing the hand she was dealt.  --May 17, 2009 @ 8:33pm

***is looking forward to a much needed date night with the hubby tomorrow....Elton John and Billy Joel concert.  Should be a great time and we can totally use the escape for awhile!!!  --May 18, 2009 @ 9:18am

***is having a fabulous day!!!  The sun is shining and both of my girls got excellent reports from the doctor today.  GOD IS GREAT!!!  --May 18th, 2009 @ 3:53pm

***is driving to see the girls and was singing my face off to some old school Dave Matthews until I realized that a car full of teenage boys were laughing hysterically at me.  --May 21, 2009 @1:32pm

***got to hold both my girls at the same time today for the very first time.  VERY COOL!!!  (pics to come soon!  just waiting on Aunt Sandy to send them to me!!)  --May 23, 2009 @ 10:38pm

***is off to see the girlies....officially six weeks old today.  Man how time flies!!!  --May 25, 2009 @ 11:06am

***is researching pediatricians.  Where to begin?  FUN FUN!!  --May 29, 2009 @ 12:04pm

***is feeling very blessed to have such amazing friends and family!!!  --May 29, 2009 @ 1:17pm

***is off to the car dealership to hopefully get a new family car.  Man, buying/selling cars gives me a headache!!!  --May 30, 2009 @ 12:54pm

***Is blah!  --May 31, 2009 @ 12:41pm

***finally finished the laundry and is off to see the girlies in my new car.  NOTE:  I said CAR....not mini-van.  WE now own a SUV and a 4 door car.  NO MINIVANS!!  --June 1, 2009 @ 1:06pm

***is snuggling with my girls in the nicu.  AWWW!!!  --June 1, 2009 @ 3:55pm

***is wondering how much more I can deal with before I lose it?  --June 2, 2009 @ 12:19pm

***has had a rough day but tomorrow will be better!  What doesn't kill me is definitely making me stronger!!!  --June 2, 2009 @ 11:10pm

***is not sweating the small stuff.  --June 4, 2009 @ 11:04am

***just had a disturbing conversation at the hospital with a 14 year old girl who just had triplets.  Some things in the world just aren't right!!!  ---June 6, 2009 @ 5:16pm

***is actually in bed before midnight, for the first time in 8 weeks.  Just laying here with Jynxie trying to relax....I think I've forgotten how?  --June 7, 2009 @ 10:06pm

***if all goes well (fingers crossed) Alexis should be home by the end of the week and Addison by the end of next week!!!  Keep praying!!!  We want them home soon!!  --June 8, 2009 @ 8:54pm

***I KNEW IT!  I JUST KNEW I WAS GONNA CURSE HER!!  WHY DID I HAVE TO OPEN MY BIG MOUTH???  CRY!  %$^@*))@&!+-+!!!!!  --June 9, 2009 @ 12:45pm

***is teary eyed.  :-(  --June 9, 2009 @ 9:39pm

***my house looks like baby land central.  It's just missing two major things....Addison & Alexis.  Insert sad face here!!!  --June 10, 2009 @ 11:33am

***Yes!  Yes, I am having a pity party.  If you'd been through half the stuff I'm dealing with right now, you would crack too!  If you don't like my status updates then stop reading them!!!  --June 10, 2009 @ 5:16pm

***where is my brain??  If you've seen it, let me know!  I've definitely lost my mind!!!  --June 10, 2009 @ 8:35 pm

***Faith makes things possible.....NOT EASY!!!  --June 14, 2009 @ 10:25pm

***is very nervous!  --June 15, 2009 @ 8:34am

***is bummed once again.  This week is not starting out very well.  --June 15, 2009 @ 8:58pm

***WHAT ELSE???  Seriously are you freaking kidding me?  Whatever it is that I have done to deserve all of this I truly am sorry!!!  --June 16, 2009 3:39pm

***two babies in the NICU costs over a half million dollars for just ONE day!!!  Really??  This is exactly what is wrong with our health care system!!!  ---June 17, 2009 @ 9:53pm

***has a nervous knot in her stomach.  I can't eat or sleep once again.  --June 19, 2009 @ 12:40pm

***I'm so excited and I just can't hide it!  I'm about to lose control and I think I like it!  --June 20, 2009 @ 11:08am

***ALEXIS IS HOME!!!  One kid down....one to go!!!  it was kinda bittersweet leaving Addison behind but we are glad to have Lex home!  --June 20, 2009 @ 9:45pm

***has never been so happy to be exhausted and functioning on no sleep!  It's just the start and I couldn't be more elated!  --June 21, 2009 @ 11:48am

***GOD IS GREAT!!!  ENOUGH SAID!!!  --June 22, 2009 @ 12:55pm

***has already accomplished more by 10am this morning than I usually do in an entire day.  (happy sigh).....the joys of motherhood!  --June 23, 2009 @9:46am

***is taking one kiddo to see the other kiddo.  --June 24, 2009 @ 11:50am

***is sitting on the deck enjoying a muggy evening, but the moon looks really cool tonight.  I have learned in the last few months to appreciate everything God provide for us....and tonight the beautiful evening at home with my daughter is it!  --June 24, 2009 @ 10:34pm

***ok, so now I officially have two car seats installed in my car.  Here's hoping we get to put baby #1 in car seat #2 tomorrow!!!  Fingers crossed!!!  Say a prayer....whatever we want her home!!!  --June 25, 2009 @ 7:14pm

***trying to get myself and daughter #2 (Alexis) ready to go break free daughter #1 (Addison)!!!!--June 26, 2009 @ 11:47am

***driving home from the hospital for the last time with BOTH MY GIRLS IN THE CAR!!!  GOD TRULY IS GREAT!!!  Thank you to everyone for their continue support and prayers for our angels!!!  --June 26, 2009 @ 3:38pm

Ok, so if you have made it to the end of this, I'm very impressed!  Probably my longest blog post ever.  But truly sometimes you have to look back to see how lucky and blessed you are to have made it to today!!!

I leave you with one final thought.....My latest Facebook status:

"just went back and read all my FB status updates since my girls were born.  I was literally moved to tears reading every one's comments and wall posts during our NICU months.  God truly is great and what a great reminder of his handy work through my kids!!!  We've come so far and God can be the only explanation why!!  --January 13, 2011


Texas Type A Mom said...

New Tuesday follower! I hope you'll follow me back!

Emily said...

Praise God for His amazing grace and faithfulness. Give your miracles a hug from me! :)

Jody McMillan said...

Okay you have me about to cry with your posts. Brings back lots of memories and even though I wish we weren't NICU mom's I'm glad god gave me you to have as a friend and guide me through it!